Voicemail In Triplicate

SimulScribe's SimulSays Visual Voicemail on th...

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Caller: I need to leave a message for the doctor, please.

Me: OK. May I ask your name please?

Caller: Jane Cummings

Me. Thank you and your phone number, please?

Caller: 864-555-1212.

Me: And the message you’d like to leave, please?

Caller: Doesn’t he have voicemail?

Me: Yes, he does.  But because we are a government entity, everything needs to be in triplicate. After you leave this message AND the voicemail, I’m going to need to ask you to call back and leave a 3rd message of exactly the same content.

*Actual caller handled by me while working for an answering service. Names & Identifying information have been changed. Bolded text is what I DESIRED to say…*

© 2010 by What I Desired to Say….


Yet another wrong number

Mr. Wrong

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Me: XYZ Communications. How May I help you?

Caller: Is this an orthopedic doctor’s office? Did I dial the right number?

Me: No. We are a magazine that publishes reviews of and articles for, surgery centers,

Caller: Oh, maybe I dialed the wrong number.

Me: Ya think? Or is the REAL wrong number here the one your father dialed 9 months before you were born?

*Actual caller handled by me while working for an answering service. Names & Identifying information have been changed. Bolded text is what I DESIRED to say…*

© 2010 by What I Desired to Say….


What SHOULD Be Taught In College

Charlie Brown's Super Book of Questions and An...

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Caller: I have some questions about your upcoming conference.

Me: OK, I’ll need to have someone call you back to answer your questions. May I get your name please?

Caller: Can’t you help me?

Me: If your questions are along the lines of my school courses this semester, “Morons: How to dumb yourself down to their level” and “Paying Attention: Harder than it seems, apparently” then yes, I can.

*Actual caller handled by me while working for an answering service. Names & Identifying information have been changed. Bolded text is what I DESIRED to say…*

© 2010 by What I Desired to Say….



Bad Translation

Me: I need to speak to your manager please.

Rep: OK, just a moment please.
(Short hold)

Manager: Hello, I am the fill-in temporvisor. How may I help you?

WIDTS: Can you get me someone else that has the brains to at least introduce themselves properly?

© 2010 by What I Desired to Say….