Service in English?

IVR I encountered today:

 

If you would like service in English, please press 1. If you would like service in Spanish, please press 2.

 

Me: (presses 1)

 

Call is then disconnected. 
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High School Admittance

I'm afraid I won't get into a high school

WIDTS: High school admittance standards in this country are laughably lax. If you can’t “get in” to one, there is a genetic scrub team that needs to visit your house.

© 2010-2013 by What I Desired to Say….

Custom Screenprinting available! No order too small/large!

Sighs of the Times

Just had this occur…

IVR: Thank you for calling ABC Corp. Please say the name…

Me: (exhale)

IVR: I’m sorry. I can’t find that name in our directory. Please re-state the name of the pers…

Me: (inhale)

IVR: I’m sorry. I still cannot find that name. Goodbye.

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No Ferrell Here


Another exchange that took place today:

Me: Hello, can I speak to Payroll, please?

CSR: There’s no one here by that name.

Me: I’m sorry, I was looking for your payroll department please.

CSR: There’s no Ferrell here.

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Employee Number, Please…

This conversation JUST happened…

CSR: Thank you for calling the Shell Employee Service Center. How can I help you?

 Me: Hello, my name is Tom and I am calling with XYZ Bank. I just had a couple of questions about your electronic payroll program. Is your payroll manager available?

CSR: Can I have your employee number please.  
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