Houston, I’m Not The One With A Problem

So today, I take the step-kid into the convenience store to use the restroom. Door’s locked, but he really needs to go so he jiggles the handle.

After a couple minutes of hearing no activity on the other side of the door(that’s actually a really disturbing thought), I decide I’m going to jiggle the handle because whoever was in there might not have heard the urgency that was in the original jiggle of the handle. This prompts a flurry of activity from the person occupying the restroom.

A minute or so later he(one of the “Adventure Guides” all morbidly obese with a scraggly beard and MONSTER gauges in his earlobes) comes out and proceeds to tell me, “If you jiggle the handle enough it unlocks the door. If you had come in, we would have had a problem.”

WIDTS: If the fact that I, a traveler and therefore someone who is unlikely to EVER visit your store again, MIGHT have walked in on you in the restroom on one of your 30-minute “Avoid work as much as possible” piss breaks is a ‘problem’ you think needs to be addressed verbally, well then I guess I know how small your penis is, now don’t I?


Feel free to tell me what YOU wanted to say!

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