Student Intuition

Note I saw on a file today:

the university accepts cc payment forstudent intuition. Need invoice to access the account.

WIDTS: Obviously, you have paid WAY too little tuition to have the job you currently have.

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English Nazi

Sentence I saw today @ work:

Correct phone number is 860.691.****, it would just entered in incorrectly on the enrollment form.

WIDTS: English teachers, you are failing and providing GREAT content for Internet trolls and grammar nazi’s everywhere. Keep up the splendid job!

Fuck You, Auto-Correct!

A portion of an email I received today:

Hello,

Below is the requested information you requested. If you have any questions please let me know.

Thank you,

WIDTS: Actually, I do have a question… has the proliferation of blogs like this one taught the human race NOTHING!?!?!? I would think with the consistent #FAIL of auto-correct, people would be proof-reading more, not less. 
*Couldn’t resist those last 2 (Recommended) tags. They went together so nicely.

High School Admittance

I'm afraid I won't get into a high school

WIDTS: High school admittance standards in this country are laughably lax. If you can’t “get in” to one, there is a genetic scrub team that needs to visit your house.

© 2010-2013 by What I Desired to Say….

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Dentist Physics

WIDTS: It may look like one, but my mouth is not a black hole you idiot. Cee Lo Green’s may be one though.

© 2012 by What I Desired to Say….

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Now vs. Then

Authorities locked down my daughter’s high school  today because a couple of kids mixed some chemicals and caused an explosion. Thankfully no one was hurt, but it got me thinking about how her high school experience differs from mine.

Now: Kids plot to blow up the school or shoot people.

Then: Kids planted vicious rumors about their enemies like, “George is gay” or “Stephanie wears granny panties.”

Now: Kid brings a manicure set to school. Principal gives a “ticket” and the kid is one piece of gum stuck under a desk from expulsion and public ridicule.

Schoolchildren eating hot school lunches made ...

School lunch, not to be confused with Skool Lunch (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Then: I used my pocket knife to cut the school lunch into pieces I could suck on and finally chew on my way home from school.

Now: Parent: “How was your day at school?” Kid: “Fine”

Then: Parent: “How was your day at school?” Kid: “Fine”

Maybe it’s not so different after all…

© 2012 by What I Desired to Say….

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