English Nazi

Sentence I saw today @ work:

Correct phone number is 860.691.****, it would just entered in incorrectly on the enrollment form.

WIDTS: English teachers, you are failing and providing GREAT content for Internet trolls and grammar nazi’s everywhere. Keep up the splendid job!

Fuck You, Auto-Correct!

A portion of an email I received today:

Hello,

Below is the requested information you requested. If you have any questions please let me know.

Thank you,

WIDTS: Actually, I do have a question… has the proliferation of blogs like this one taught the human race NOTHING!?!?!? I would think with the consistent #FAIL of auto-correct, people would be proof-reading more, not less. 
*Couldn’t resist those last 2 (Recommended) tags. They went together so nicely.

Driver’s License DENIED!

 

This is a real advertisement for a “dating/escort” service I saw on the interwebs:

WIDTS: A blonde Asian? Please tell me this person will never be granted a driver’s license.

© 2012 by What I Desired to Say….

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Not Extended Enough

Recently, I installed a browser extension to get rid of the Farcebook Blue coloring I had grown tired of. (Go UTES! Kill the Cougs!) Part of the functionality of this extension is a Tip of the Day. That’s it on the right.

Now, I’m a guy that likes to know how things work, so I followed the instructions. the following was the result…

WIDTS: Bloody brilliant! No one will know who I am, sir.

© 2012 by What I Desired to Say….

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Redux: Fired!

Originally posted on January 29, 2010:

Chainsaw in action. Suomi: Moottorisaha toimin...

FB Post: OMG! the apt next to mine had a huge fire this morning and I woke up an hour ago to the sound of chainsaws. What an awesome life I have

Comment on said post: U alrite?

WIDTS: No, they are not. They are still on fire an hour later, but took the time to post a status on FB! WTF!?!?!?

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No Hope… Or Is There?

Passages from a book by a well-known and best-selling author:

[status draft] Passage 1: “Mo might be dead in there,” Lula said. “Or maybe he’s sick. Could of had a stroke and be laying on the bathroom floor.”

Passage 2: “We would of found his car. And if he was dead he would of started to smell by now.”

Passage 3: “Course, he could have locked himself in the ice cream freezer,” Lula said.

WIDTS: Same character said all 3 lines, and in one of them, the editor used the proper phrasing. I understand that there is some literary license involved in being a fiction author, but if you’re going to take it, use it ALL THE WAY.

On a lighter note, millions of internet morons now believe they can write a book. Way to encourage them, Miss Evanovich.

© 2012 by What I Desired to Say….